Final Thoughts:Bitter

Being a senior is going to be a lot of work. However, I know and my classmates know that it will all be worth it in the end. All these years of hard work will pay off. Now I like many other seniors have taken on many opportunities that are offered to us. This seems to have slipped the minds of our teachers and administration team. For our last summer as Chinquapin students we were given the task of reading four or five books. While in the past seniors only read two books and tops three. On top of that we also had to have six blogs done before school started.

Many people will agree that this is not a hard task for college prep students. However, we are also low income college prep students with many opportunities. If we weren't traveling then we were working. If we weren't working then we were spending time with our family. If we weren't spending time with our family we were busy. Why should we travel? Because we deserve it. Why should we work? Because unlike other people most of us have to pay for anything and everything we want. We can't just always ask our parents for money. Why should we spend time with our family? Because we hardly have the time to do it.

One of the many sacrifices Chinquapin students make is their family. Because we choose to go to a school where we spend more than half our day there, we slowly but surely slip away from our family. We don't really have time to spend with them because we are so focused on Chinquapin. The one thing many students get is summer. A time that is supposed to be spent with family. I would think that on my last summer I would get that joy after so many years of sacrifice.

However, that wasn't the case. I know no one forced me or other students to get busy during summer. However, why should our summers be consumed by Chinquapin. We already devote most of our life to it. When my summer started I was at SAT Prep 10 hours a day everyday. I had to wake up at 6 to catch the bus to make it to the SAT office at 9. Then I had a small week off, which I spend sleeping in and enjoying my family and friends. By this week I received my homework form Chinquapin. Then I started to wake up at 6 to catch the bus to make it to RICE for the RSBI program by 9. I wouldn't get home until 6-7. Because of those long bus rides I got some of my reading done, but if it weren't for that I may have been behind. Then on the second week of RSBI I started working at night after my classes. I wouldn't get home until 1 am on these nights. Then after RSBI was done I started SCA. Again I had to wake up at 6 to be at the office by 8. Then I started SAT prep on weekends. I had to wake up at 6 to be at the office by 9. Then I would go to work. Every night I got home at 1 am and left around 6 am. Luckily by the third week of SCA and SAT prep and work my brother gave me a car. I got two more hour of sleep on weekdays and three more hours on weekends. Unfortunately, because I got those extra hours of sleep, and no longer rode the bus, I had no time to continue reading.

Where in that schedule did I find the time to do all this Chinquapin work? I didn't. Thanks to the administration team and/or teachers I will start my senior year knowing that I didn't get my work done. I didn't get to my last book. And the only reason I read three out of four was because I read one of them for fun right before school ended. So in reality I only read two during the summer. I can only imagine how the kids who took the opportunity to go to World Learning must feel. If they were gone for a month and only had two weeks notification of the work they had to do, how did they do it? Most didn't.

Of others who didn't do a summer program or work, which was very few, I am a bit disappointed. But not very disappointed, because I know and feel like them that this was unfair. It wasn't fair to us and it definitely wasn't fair to y'all. Now you will start the year off behind because you made a teaching plan which none of the students will be able to follow.

Some of us went ahead and just enjoyed summer, because after so much Chinquapin you want a break. You get tired. You get fed up. And it wasn't fair. This being the summer where I would spend some time with my nephews, who I hardly see. Instead I have this thing in me that is bugging me. My heart aches because I had no time for my nephews. The reason I try and be the best is to set an example for them. However, how can I show them or tell them what I do, if I never have the chance to see them. All they know is that I can't spend time with them.

Now tomorrow, most of the teachers will want to say to my classmates why couldn't you just do your work? And honestly I feel like I've been cheated of my summer, and just a little of my senior year. Y'all will probably tell me good job because even with everything I did, I used every little bit in me to do some work. And I will be thinking in my head how upset I truly am. Because of y'all I didn't have enough time with my family. So thank you very much for making me just a little more bitter.